


A Fetish In Flames

by CoolestCucumber, violetfields



Category: The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien, johnlock - Fandom
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Bilbo Baggins & Smaug Friendship, Bilbo in the sky, Fetish, Flying Hobbit, Gay, M/M, Objectophillia, Other, Pedophillia, Smauglock, Underage - Freeform, extremeheatfetish, firefetish, older dragon, pyrofetish, younger hobbit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-28
Updated: 2014-07-28
Packaged: 2018-02-09 02:49:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1966125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoolestCucumber/pseuds/CoolestCucumber, https://archiveofourown.org/users/violetfields/pseuds/violetfields
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey. My hobby is to grope your hiney." -Smaug the Gr8</p><p>Smaug is all grown up. 420 years, he is older and wiser and quite large of a beast as is other things in this fable...</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Fetish In Flames

**Author's Note:**

> 1k+ hits? lmao what is wrong with u guys

Smaug has grown up. 420 years, he is older and wiser and quite large of a beast as is other things in this fable...

His wings fluttered about in his Man Cave but his voice was so well-projected and bassy it was louder than the noise of his 70 metre-spanned wings. "Wibbly Wobbly, Timey Wimey, My Hobby is to grope your Heiny", he sang. 

all of a sudden the sweet operatic voice of bilbo baggins filled the room, he was covered only by his handkerchief that has been twisted over his big peenie in an erotic thong.

There he stood, waiting for a sign that he was meant to be here. "you may proceed my stripper" said a deep voice. bilbo's peenie peeked out from under the handkerchief and said "hey, I'm peenie and I love everything pink" and then big peenie started to do the big peenie dance getting longer and longer until peenie was a meter long.

Smaug felt faint as he was wanking very hard, then his life was flashing before his eyes. He tilted his head back and roared into orgasm. But he wasn't finished yet, oh no. He picked up Bilbo with his talons in one claw, and with the other, he picked up a handful of gold coins as his bed was made out of that. He ripped Bilbo's make-shift thong off with one of his fangs and sat him onto the hill of gold coins which lay in his other palm. Exposing his gay-hole to all the treasures, it worked like a vacuum and it sucked up all of Smaug's Money!!! Not just the one's that lay in his palm, but every where around him! Bilbo was zooming about in mid-air in the castle with his butt in the forward direction. His gay-hole steering into oblivion and sucking up everything that was gold. Smaug thought he was swiping his treasures and was now furious, he yelped, "SWIPER NO SWIPING". 

Smaug stuck his giant claw up Bilbo's butt cheeks and Bilbo's wongle wang grew over 50 meters long, depositing all the gold into his extra length. now bilbo had the length to make even Smaug scream. but Smaug had other idea. with one swift bite Bilbo's giant peenie was no longer a giant peenie. it was a short stubby peenie and Smaug decided the best place to shove this was up Bilbo's butt hole which made his chode thicken in both diameter and circumference 

"Burn me baby", Bilbo pleaded. He had nearly reached his climax. Smaug sniffed and his eyes watered,  
"but u will not respawn".  
"I don't give a fak, I have a fetish for fire"  
so Smaug got his shit together and released his load of flames from his gay hole. load after load. He roasted Bilbo, and all that survived was a small hard stub of flesh. The rest of him was ashes. Even the coins he had stored in his gay hole had vanished as Bilbo had a rift somewhere in there that led into the 666th Dimension. 

suddenly smaugs big peenie decided that he wanted to become the leader of a multinational conglomerate that sold sex toys for fellow dragons and he married a cat named laquisha and lived gayly ever after


End file.
